Fairness vs. Kindness

Fairness doesn't always equate to kindness. Being fair does not necessarily mean being kind - and the reverse is true as well. Sometimes, to be fair to one person, one must be unkind to another. Sometimes, to be kind to one person, one must be unfair to another. The occasional bending (or breaking) of rules to give someone a break, or the blowing off of a previously made appointment in order to help a friend in need, may not technically be "fair" but are certainly worthy of commendation. Conversely, making somebody unhappy while maintaining over and over, albeit truthfully, that one acted fairly is hardly a noble course of action. Whenever possible, choose kindness over fairness.

Kindness as a Weapon

All of us will do well to remember that kindness, while normally a virtue, can also be used as a weapon. What we must consider is whether or not the kindness is habitual, and whether or not it is being employed under certain circumstances, during certain crises, or for a certain purpose. And we need to be conscious of whether or not the kindness remains after the circumstances have changed, the crisis has passed, or the favor has been granted.